Verse: Em Am Em Am Em Iʼm counting back the number of the steps Am Em B7 C B7 it took for me to get back on the wagon of the weekend Em Am Em Am G Iʼll use the autotimer to prove that Iʼll Am C D get home with my imagination G Am C D if they find the body in the basement G Am C D in the very house that she was raised in Em Am Em Am Em Iʼm taking down the number of the times Am Em B7 C B7 so when we get the sign from god Iʼll be the first to call them Em Am Em Am G Iʼm taking back the number of the beast Am C D cause six is not a pretty number G Am C D eight or three are definitely better G Am C D А is for the address on the letter G Am C D Em to my alcoholic friends Am Em Am Em Am B7 Verse: Em Am Em Am Em Iʼm trying hard not to be ashamed Am G Am C D not to know the name of who is waking up beside me G Am C D or the date, the season, or the city G Am C D but at least the ceilingʼs very pretty G Am C D and if you are holding it against me Em B7 C B7 Iʼll be on my best behavior Em B7 C B7 taking shots for mother nature Em B7 C B7 once my fist is in the cupboard Em B7 C B7 love is never falling over Am Em Am Em Am B7 Verse: G Am C D Should I choose a noble occupation? G Am C D If I did Iʼd only show up late and G Am C D sick and they would stare at me with hatred G Am C D plus my only natural talentʼs wasted G Am C D G on my alcoholic friends Am C D G my alcoholic friends Am C D G the party never ends Am C D Em my alcoholic friends