Verse: E7 You want a guy thatʼs sweet C#m A guy thatʼs tough C#m A feminist who likes to pay for stuff A The kinda guy that gets along with your friends B Without being attracted to any of them E7 A good boy, a bad boy, a good bad boy C#m A half good half bad half boy A Loves your brother sensitive but not weak and B Is a great lover calls your mother on the weekend E7 A C#m Then you might think that this guy only exists in your mind Well guess what B Youʼre right Chorus: E7 If you want love C#m Lower your expectations a few A B Cause Prince Charming would never settle for you E7 If you want love C#m Just pick a guy and love him A And if heʼs got a thing for feet B Say fuck it, sweep me off them Verse: E7 You want a girl thatʼs nice C#m A girl thatʼs not C#m Obsessed with her looks but is insanely hot A The kinda girl that you can show to your folks B Loves the movies that you like and always laughs at your jokes E7 A real girl, a hot girl, a really hot girl C#m A brand new really hot real doll A Wants to impress you doesnʼt care if you notice B And only ever uses you to tickle her throat with E7 A C#m Then you might think that this girl only exists in your mind B Sheʼs real But last week She died Chorus: E7 If you want love C#m Lower your expectations a lot A B You might think your dick is a gift I promise itʼs not E7 If you want love C#m Just pick a girl and love her A Then whip out your dick and let the B Girl you love decline the offer E7 I donʼt want a neat freak I donʼt want a slob C#m Or somebody with bedhead and a dead-end job A Cause I wonʼt settle for less B Than perfect E7 Want perfect children, a perfect life C#m Perfect husband or a perfect wife A But deep down I know B I donʼt deserve it [Mute] But E7 We all deserve love C#m Even on the days when we arenʼt our best A Cause we all suck B But love can make us suck less E7 We all deserve love C#m Itʼs the very best part of being alive A And I would know B Iʼm almost twenty five
